3/24/2012
At 71 years of age, former Vice President Dick Cheney received a full organ heart transplant
from his unwilling eleven-year old Chinese Sherpa Short Round, at the Experimental
Hospital of Dark Side Medicine. Head Cardiac Surgeon and High Priest Mola Ram says the American dignitary
and dedicated supplicant to the War
Goddess Kali is in good spirits and relatively good health. Brief services
for Short Round were held at a hidden location under the Temple of Doom. Officials at the International Criminal Court were overjoyed to hear that now they
had a possible ten more years to bring War Crime charges against Cheney.
In related news, former President Jimmy Carter
is asking The Wizard for a
transplant of courage, and former President
George W. Bush is requesting a brain. Emerald City Officials would not
comment on their relative positions on the Organ Donor Lists, but indicated
that Carter’s transplant would certainly be easier, as his soul is so much
wider than Bush’s skull.
